Debt-Free Culture.. Why I feel it is Killing our Budgeting Mo-Jo Lesson13
Good-Day ‘humans’,
Yes that is what we are HUMANS. As humans we have a certain nature, aspects of us that we all tend to turn towards regardless of who, what or where we are and that is ‘We do not like to fail’. It is that simple we do not enjoy failure. I HATE failing at anything. I feel at this stage I have half my life or so done (who knows I may make 90 but I don’t see it). The part where I have learnt most of my lessons is over. Looking back I see I stayed too long in situations, be it friendships, romantic relationships, jobs, studying things I did not enjoy or pushing ideas that were going nowhere. Why? Because I did not want to fail. It was like sticking a square peg into a round hole, I kept at it cause I could not fail. I am incredibly stubborn. I know my faults, I will hold my hands up to this one. However, I have come to a stage in my life where I am ‘learning’ to know when to call it a day and move on.
This is why I feel the ‘Debt-Free Culture’ can be absolute poison. Your all properly thinking I have lost the plot. Is that what I am about? Is that what I stand for? Yes it is but in moderation. I am not here telling you to whip out the credit card and head to Brown Thomas. I am not telling you to walk into the garage and walk out with a brand new car that you will either never fully own or end up breaking your ass each month to pay for. No I am telling you my mindset around debt has changed. You hear a lot about good debt and bad debt. I don’t think there is good or bad, just debt. However, what if I was to put it to you a different way and give it a new name. Why can’t we look on it as sensible debt?
So what do I mean by sensible debt? By this I mean debt that you know that you will realistically be able to pay off. Debt that your not ‘topping’ up and that is not putting you in a situation where you will be ‘stuck’ in a job you hate to pay it off or worse acquiring such debt to an extent that you will never be in a position to pay off quickly. See I use the word quickly, by this I mean you will have the means or the will to burst your ass off to pay it off in the shortest possible time frame. I am a big fan of Credit Unions. Where would Ireland be without the ‘Credit Union Loan’? I grew up hearing about this mysterious place that if you were short money you could go into the Credit Union and all will be okey. Did not matter if it was you were short for the kids going back to school or a holiday to Coasta de Bravo, you could hit the credit union. Again I am not telling you to go mad but the beauty that comes along with the credit union is you can pay it off as quickly as possible with no hassle. Just get the loan IBAN and add it to your current account.
Tip: Every time you check your current account and see an uneven number, move it to loan. eg. You have 87.22 in current account. Move 7.22 to loan. It is the fastest way to reduce your debt with minimal effort and credit unions take it off both principle and interest. Saving you euro’s in the long run.
So why am I saying I feel the debt-free culture can be toxic? Put it simply ‘we do not like to fail’! We don’t and watching all the debt free warriors makes us think ‘what the hell is wrong with me’. This can play devils advocate on our budgeting skills. We want to do well. We want to make things work but we are watching all these people who seem to have it in the bag, but here we are struggling to pay the bloody milkman. So often the result is to give up. After all, if you don’t try then you can’t fail.
Three years ago I discovered the debt free community on Instagram. It was lock-down, the year the world stopped. I was on maternity leave with three older kids to ahem ‘home-school’. A term I use lightly as it was a nightmare. I had my usual post natal depression, something I got with each baby and I felt like I was losing the plot. No health nurse to be seen, just phone calls. My sisters both live abroad so they saw my baby once when he was new born and not again for two years, something that made me incredibly sad and visits to my parents consisted of me standing in the garden holding up my baby to show them their new grandson. If I knew what I know now, I wouldn’t have stayed away so long. But I was terrified I would harm them. Which is stupid now as I was a prisoner in my own home as it was, seeing nobody. I couldn’t control what was happening in the world but I could control one thing, my money.
One evening I said I am writing a book and off I went. I asked someone lovely to edit it and she advised me I needed to market it, so I started an Instagram account and discovered ‘The Debt Free Community’. This was great, I got really motivated and it helped me through a really difficult part of my life. I kicked my goals, I got rid of my debts and it was all easy, simply because I had no-where to go! As time has gone on it has gotten harder and harder to stay debt free. The cost of living crisis has meant I really do not have a lot of money to save at the end of the month. My kids are getting older, the result is they are eating me out of house and home, therefore costing me so much more. October 2022 a car crash left me with a completely wrote off car. I had planned on driving my car till it basically died on me. It was a great car and one I believe I manifested as a child. Alas, this was not to be. I needed a loan. I couldn’t bring myself to apply. Feck sake I am ‘Irish Budgeting Mammy’, I can not let my followers down.
My biggest hold up in getting the loan was I needed to hold the stance of being an example to my followers. Debt-free ringing in my ears. Your debt-free, people want to see you debt free. Light bulb moment, I will save for a new car and drive a temporary crock till then. Eh bad idea, when coming home from Christmas shopping and your on the side of the N4 with two kids sitting on the grass on a freezing December night after ringing high-way maintenance. You will find different thoughts cross will your mind, mostly GET ME HOME but also I need to do something.
So I got a car loan. Took me till just before Paddy’s Day to apply. All seamless and yesterday I came home with my new (not brand new) car. Tip: Do not ever buy a brand new car.
I spent more than I had planned but I have gone up in more years than I planned also. This is where I bring in the part of emotional spending. No financial decision is EVER based solely on the practical side. There will always be an emotional element. I do not care who you are or how practical you may think you may be, the element of emotions will always play a role. When I was a small child I used to play a game with my mum about what was our dream cars. She always said an Audi, which she did get and I used to say a BMW which I also got. As a single mum and in collage I needed a car, I got a car, I kid you not, described in the log-book as ‘tango’ colored, reliable, steady, never give me any trouble but as my kids called it ‘the big red fun-bus’. I hated it but was also grateful of it. I believe this level of gratefulness manifested my dream car. I finished collage and got a Job which allowed me to fund my dream car and now I have manifested it again. I still see it as manifestation even with a loan as I know I have both the means and the will to pay it off FAST.
I may not be debt free right now but I am no longer feeling guilty over it. I like a lifestyle with nice things so I plan on side hustling my way to becoming debt free again as fast as I can. Also judging by my followers feedback, there was a sigh of relief to me bringing a sense of normality to life. The unfortunate truth is it is often not realistic to imagine a full life time of debt free living. So let go of the guilt and remember life is short. Rather than aspire to living a life of debt free, aspire to a life of living within you means.
Steps to get out of debt fast:
- Stop spending more than you have. Track your spending.
- Side hustle to earn extra money and use every cent earned to pay off your debt.
- Freeze credit card to avoid acquiring more debt.
- Keep a record of what debt you have, interest rates and time left.
- Make a long term goal of paying it off fast. Start with highest interest debt and smallest debts first.
- Focus your mindset to ‘getting out of debt’.
- See where you can cut back and make sacrifices.
- Always keep an emergency fund to avoid more debt.
- Any extra money, put it towards your debt.
- Finally do not get additional debt you have is fully paid off.
